iFindHer!
by Maggi3Babii27
Summary: Sam see's Freddie and Carly kiss and she leaves and goes to L.A. Freddie finds out from Spencer that she left, he goes after her with Gibby who is depressed about something! Like I said I am terrible at Summaries! So read! (:
1. Chapter 1

**iChaseYou**

*Sam POV*  
It is around 10 o'clock right now and it just started to rain, of course my luck right? I was on this amazing motorcycle that Spencer gave me, 1964 Sterling. I still can't believe he gave it to me. It feel so unreal, just like that kiss between Carly and Freddie. Ugh, so here what happened.  
I was walking up to the studio to get my jacket that I had left I had seen her grab him on the lips and he just took it like when I kissed him when we had the school lock in. Anyways, It was cold in Seattle, I was freezing but I didn't wanna go back to the Bushwall so I climbed on my motorcycle and drove. I kept thinking about the reason I left the whole time, Freddie Benson. I saw him kiss my best friend, well her kiss him, why would she do that? She knew that I loved him, I told her why we broke up and how I felt about the break up and him. I knew it was a mutual break up but it still hurt. We were together for months. I loved being with Freddie, he was so sweet to me. I keep thinking about that kiss, it feels like it was going on for hours when it probably was going on for like 5 seconds. Everyone was obsessed with her, she was pretty and smart, she has brown hair and a bubbly personality that everyone loved, why can't I have that? I had blonde messy hair, I am sarcastic, rude, mean, bad girl, aggressive, and a tomboy that has no respect for anyone. I get why Freddie don't want me. All I did to Freddie was bully him. I hurt him daily, beat him, called him names and tortured him, he saw comfort in Carly because she was the complete opposite of me. This was the same thought all the way to L.A. when I got to L.A. I found the closest hotel and got a room, I didn't feel like driving anymore. I haven't decided if I wanna keep driving in the morning or stay. I definitely wasn't going back to Seattle, I couldn't be around Freddie.  
"$136.00 for one room" This young girl with brown hair with blonde highlights said. She seemed kind of looked like Carly, I know that its not her but she really looks like her. I paid for the room ad she gave me room key 547. "Thank you" I said. The girl smiled at me and said "You're welcome" She really looked like Carly at that moment. God, I need to get some rest, I thought. I went up to room and layed my stuff on the ground and laid on the bed and I sent Spencer a text telling him where I am and telling him thanks for the motorcycle. I laid my phone down and I got under the covers and turned of the bedside light and then went to sleep.

*Freddie POV*

I can't believe this just happened, Carly Shay kissed me and then left and went to Italy, why'd she do that? I thought that her kissing me would help me get over Sam and I's break up. I mean, it was a mutual feeling but I love her, I still do, all that kiss did for was get Carly on my mind. I am like obsessed with both, I can't choose which one I want, Sam is beautiful and strong. Carly is super nice, smart and very pretty. Spencer sent me a text, why Spencer its 6 pm! Aren't you suppose to be on a date! I looked at the text that read '**Hey, Freddie...Sam's gone, she just sent me a text saying that she went to L.A. :(' **I read this and my heart just dropped in my chest. I got to go get her. Why would Sam even leave? Did she leave because Carly left? Oh god, she saw the kiss. Wait, does she even love me anymore? What am I thinking she don't want me anymore, she was probably happy when we broke up. I am probably just crazy... I really just need to know where exactly she went so I won't have all these thoughts going through my mind. I feel like I am going crazy, I feel like I am gonna lose my mind if I don't find her and kiss her let her know that she's the only thing I want, the only thing I ever will want! Carly is gone and I thought her kissing me changed my mind but when I figured out that Sam was gone I freaked out, I love her. I wanna find her, I texted Gibby and asked him for his car. Shocker right, Gibby can actually drive, I only have my permit so he's gonna have to come with. Gibby replied like two minutes giving me permission, I was ecstatic. Gibby arrived like 15 minutes later with the car, he lives a few blocks away I wonder what took him so long, I didn't ask because I was too happy that I was gonna find Sam. Gibby and I barely talked the whole way there, makes it seem like he has something wrong with him, maybe its because Carly left and he was like in love with her. I decided to leave him to his solitude. We drove like about hours 9 hours alternating driving every 3 hours. I started and finished when we finally arrived in L.A. it was 3 in the morning. I decided I would start my search for Sam in the morning, for now I am gonna sleep, I went to the hotel and as soon as I got to the room I saw a blonde hair girl standing at the candy machine.  
"Sam?"  
The blonde starred at me all wide eyed and said "Freddie?! What are you doing here?"


	2. Author's Note!

Sorry that I haven't been posting all that much, I have had a lot of stuff to do, when I finally got adjusted to it someone I went to high school died so yeah, that kind of put it off but I will update I promise I am almost done with the chapter I am on now, I just have to finish the scene and then edit my mistakes.

Love, Maggi3Babii6927!

XOXO!


	3. Chapter 2

Sam's POV

Oh god, Freddie Benson, I can't be near him now. Wait, why is he here? He's probably here with his mother at some parenting meeting, he goes somewhere once a year. I turned around and walked up to him.

"Freddie?! What are you doing here?"

Freddie quickly replied "Are you serious Sam?"

"Yeah, I am" Why is he getting all angered at me, I didn't do nothing wrong! He kissed Carly knowing how I felt about him! He has no right to even be a little mad at me.

"I could ask you the same, Sam." Freddie replied.

"Psh. None of your business Benson." I snapped back.

"Well then it's none of yours either. Just don't even talk to me if you're gonna be like this. If you'll excuse me, I've got a room to check in to." Freddie walked off.  
"I hope you trip and fall."

"Hah! Not lik-" Freddie trips over his own shoe laces and quickly regains his balance, his face turned red. "THAT DOESN'T COUNT!"

"Oooooooooh yes it does Fredward." We both storm off to go to our rooms. We realized that our rooms are right beside each other.  
"Uuuuuugh!" The groan in synchronization.

I storm in my room and slam the door. I sit on the edge of the bed then I look at the door that is connecting my room to Freddie's.

I groan really loudly and then I throw the phone that is laying on the mattress at that door, then I cover my face with a pillow. Seconds later I hear a door open then I look up with Freddie standing in the doorway.

"Could you be any louder?" Freddie said with that same smug looks he ALWAYS makes.

"I could, want me to me be?" I said sarcastically, that pissed Freddie off, I can tell when he's mad at me. He bawls up his fists and take a deep breath and talks to me in a deeper voice.

"Sam, can't you just be fucking quiet, it's not that hard!"

He gets up in my face and yells at me, this should piss me off but it doesn't, it's all kinds of sexy when he gets angry. I want to just smash my lips against his and let him know how much I want him but I restrain myself from doing so. I back away from him and I remain quiet.

"What? You have nothing to say now? You always have something to say!"

"I...I just..."

I clear my throat and then I open the door connecting our rooms.

"You should go Freddie... Don't try to come here in the morning because I won't here, I will be long gone, so don't follow me Freddie."

Freddie walks through the door and I shut it behind him then I hear and loud bang and glass breaking and I knew that his fist just connected to the mirror, I grab the ice bucket sitting on the table then I grab a rag out of the bathroom. I wait a few minutes before I walk into his room, I wanted to hear him say something or I wanted him to come back in here to tell me he hurt himself or something but he doesn't so I open the connecting door again and I see Freddie sitting in front of his bed with his hand swelling and bleeding, I look the mirror that is shattered all over the floor, I'll pick it up once I handle Freddie. I walk towards him, Freddie doesn't even recognize me in the doorway and if he does he hasn't acknowledged it. I sit in front of him and grab his hand and he looks and me and I see that his eyes are red, he must've been crying or he's tired, I wasn't gonna ask him right now. I help Freddie up and I take him to the bathroom sink and I wash the blood off of his hand so I can see his cuts, he winces in pain when I do this, I see these plastic small garbage bag sitting on the sink so I grab one and fill it with ice and put on his hand.

"Why?"

I looked at him confused wondering what he's talking about.

"Why what?"

"Why are you helping me, I would've been fine, it would have bled then it would have dried up"

"I care about you Freddie I didn't want it to be bleed, I didn't even want you to punch that mirror"

I grab another garbage bag but I don't open it I take the rag and place it on his hand then I tie the garbage bag tightly around his hand and then I get up and I grab the broken pieces of glass and put them in the trash can then I put a towel over the pieces that are too small to be picked up, Freddie can have a maid clean it up for him.

"Can't you see that I care about you too?"

"Why'd you leave then? Why did you run away?"

"You wanted Carly and there was no point for me to be in Seattle if all you wanted was Carly, she was gone so no one was there to want me. Mom never wanted me at least she kind of took care of me, dad died, Melanie left to go to some fucking boarding school and Carly left to go to Italy to go live with her father and you kissed her and whenever I was hurt you never seemed to realize because Carly was there! I am nothing to you...I am going to go to bed, bye Freddie!"

I went and into my room and then I waited for about 10 minutes and then I turned out my light and went to sleep I woke up at 3 something because I have received a phone call from Freddie's house phone, Marissa, why would she call me? Does she know what the damn time is? She's probably wondering where her son is, I'll answer her to let her know that he followed me and that I don't want him here. Why wouldn't she call him? Maybe his phone dead, I answered the phone.

"Hello?"


	4. Chapter 3

*Sams POV*

"Hello?"  
"Samantha, is that you?"  
"Yes, I know why you're calling, you can't find Freddie well..." I was cut off with her voice reassuring me that's not why she was calling.  
"No, I know where Freddie is, he's not the problem, it's Spencer!  
"What did he do now?"  
"Sam, he...he died, I called to let you know, I have called Carly and she was completely hysterical and she's on her way back to Seattle and I wanted you to tell Freddie because he left his charger here so I know his phone is dead, I called and it sent me straight to voicemail"  
I was completely in shock, Spencer is gone...he was like a best friend/father/brother to me! He always protected me and Carly it may have seemed like he didn't care what we did but I know he did, I just can't believe he died... "Sam?"  
I just realized that I haven't replied to her.  
"Uh, yeah... I am here, how... how'd he die?"  
"A fire... ironic right?"  
"...yeah, will there be a viewing?"  
"No, his burns are way to bad so the funeral will be a closed casket, Carly, Freddie, you and I can all go and identify him if you want. It's at the Seattle Hospital, in the morgue, tomorrow at 6 pm. Carly is flying here, I was hoping you could come and bring Freddie and if you want to stay somewhere you can stay at my house."  
"What about T-bo?"  
"He moved in with his girlfriend."  
"You can stay in our guest room, if you don't stay then Freddie will just keep chasing after you and I want to spend time with my son before I die!"  
"Mrs. Benson, what do you mean?"  
"Uh, Samantha, please ask Freddie not me, I really don't feel like talking about it, Carly is calling me now, I'm gonna go! Bye Samantha!"  
Then she hung up, I wonder what's wrong with her. I can't leave tomorrow like I planned. I walk up to the door and turn the doorknob; I was shocked that the door was unlocked. I open it and I see an empty bed, where is he? His light is on and the bathroom door in cracked. He may be in there. I sit on the edge of his bed. I waited for like 5 minutes then I knocked on Freddie's bathroom door and I actually hear sobbing, I slowly open the door and I see Freddie sitting on the edge of the bathtub.  
"Freddie?"  
He stands up so quickly, I think I startled him! "Sam!"  
"I scared you didn't I?"  
"Yeah, a little bit, what are you doing in here, it's 3 in the morning!"  
"I know, I just have to tell you something and I don't know how you're gonna react"  
"Sam, what's going on?"  
"Uh, I actually have a question for you first..."  
"Alright, what is it?"  
"What is wrong with your mom?"  
"Um, how do you know that something is wrong with her?"  
"She told me to ask you while I tell you what's wrong."  
"Uh, she has cancer... Stage 2 Thyroid Cancer..."  
"What does that mean?"  
"She... she has a tumor in her thyroid."  
"Where's your thyroid?"  
"Right here." Freddie lightly touches my neck, it gives me goosebumps because I wasn't expecting him to touch me. He pulls away from me, I know he didn't feel anything and it didn't mean anything when he touched me. I seriously lost my train of thought. I come back when Freddie says my nickname and snaps his fingers in front of my face.  
"Sam... Sam...?! Princess Puckett!"  
"Oh, yeah... Freddie, what?"  
"Now what's your information?"  
"It's Spencer... he's... uhm... he's dead." Her voice shakes.  
"...wow, uh... does... does Carly know?"  
"Yes... according to your mother she... didn't take it too well..." Suddenly my eyes start to water. I am trying to hold back the tears welling up but I just can't... Spencer was like a big brother to me AND a father to me, he meant everything to me! I can't believe he's gone! - Wait... I just realized... I walked in on Freddie sobbing... He looks crushed. Like nothing in his life is ever gonna be okay.  
"Freddie?"  
"...Sam..."  
"Why were you crying earlier?"  
"I was thinking about my mom and how she's dying and then you drop this bomb shell... about... about Spencer and mom and I... I..." He starts to cry into a pillow. I crawl on the bed, give him a really tight hug and cry with him. Freddie is slowly losing everyone. I really hope his mom doesn't die, he needs someone in his life to watch out for him and care for him. Another 15 minutes and we're all cried out. Freddie takes the pillow off his face. I wipe the tears away and he gives me a faint smile in return. He started to lean closer to me my breathing started to get really fast paced...what is Freddie doing?


	5. Author Note! --

**Hey, I totally messed this up, I accidently deleted the first chapter so now its the last chapter and I have no idea on how to fix it. Anyone know how to make it the first chapter again?**


	6. Chapter 4

**Sorry I haven't been posting I have been busy and then I got my computer taken so I had to use my fiancee's computer...So yeah... I hope you enjoy! :)(:**

* * *

*Sam's POV*

Freddie leaned so close to me that I could feel his hot breath on my neck. He puts his lips to mine ever so lightly. In that moment, I feel as if I never want to let him go. That I just want to kiss him forever. But, I pulled away as soon as he kissed me. Freddie looked at me in confusion. I could tell he was upset. It seems to me that the only reason he kissed me was because he thinks that I am the only good thing left in his life. Spencer died, Marissa is dying and Carly left for Italy. Man is he REALLY gonna hate me after I tell him that kissing me isn't going to make his life better.

"Why'd you pull away?" Freddie stared in confusion.

" Freddie, I..." I started to reply; I couldn't break his heart... "I don't know"

"...I know why..." He bowed his head in depression.

"Why...?" I sighed.

"You pulled away because of the reason I kissed you... everyone I had is gone or is in the process of leaving... you're the only one who isn't gone. I see comfort in you and even when you're mad at me you're still there for me... Sam you held me while I was crying and I know your heart was breaking too. You can't be the thing that fixes it all, I know that... it can't ever be fixed... they are always gonna be gone." Freddie's voice shakes as he starts tearing up.

I am completely speechless... I... I didn't know what to say... I just gave Freddie the comfort he needed... I definitely needed too. I laid on the bed and Freddie laid beside me, I turned towards him and snuggled close to him and he wrapped his arms around me, his hands in my hair holding me tight, I lightly let out a sob into Freddie's chest.

*Freddie's POV*

A crying Sam, you don't see this all that much. I just hold her and hug her to let her know everything will be alright...or will it? We fell asleep like ten minutes later of us laying there.

I opened my eyes and looked at the alarm clock sit on the bedside table, I saw that it read 12:38, I sat up and looked around and I saw Sam beside me, I threw the covers off of me and I saw that I was still clothed. Okay, that's a good thing, I didn't drink last night, why don't I remember anything? I rub my eyes and get out of the bed and walk to the other side of the bed and wake up Sam.

"Unnnh!" Sam covers her head with the blanket.

"Sam, get up!" I pull the cover off of her again...She gets really mad now. She punch's me in the stomach and I feel like puking at that moment.

"Now let me sleep Fredward!" She puts the covers over herself once more! Okay no more Mr. Nice Guy! I grab her and throw her over my shoulder and I hold her while she's hitting me and punching me, it hurts but I can still hold her. Sam eventually gives up beating and puching on me. I hold her with one arm while I grab her clothes that she had laid out in her room and I throw her on her bed. I throw the clothes on the bed beside her. "Now get dressed or I will make you!"

"You won't do shit!" Sam throws her clothes at me.

"Sam!" I have became really angered already. "C'mon get up already, I can't do this today!"

"Okay, I'm sorry!"

She randomly hugs me... Sam never hugs me... I guess she's just shook up over the fact Spencer died. I mean how can we not be affected... Spencer was like family to me! He was like a brother, I could always come to him for advice and I could always come to him for a joke and now he's gone!

I hug Sam back and I run my fingers through her hair. She looks at me and she gets very close to me then she backs away... Sam clears her throat.

"Uhm, I am gonna go get dressed"

She goes into the bathroom and changes clothes...shes back in 2 minutes. I have never seen a girl get dressed that fast.

Sam's different though...All I have been around my whole life was girly girls...I really don't like girly girls. I liked Carly but we were best friends...Sam and me have been enemies and friends and then we've been together... I can't get her off of my mind and then making up this shit about how I am only kissing her because I am depressed! I am so stupid...She will never give me another chance!

*Sam's POV*  
I just wanna get these next few days over with... I hate being upset... I hate this feeling... that feeling you get in your chest and stomach and your heart...they all hurt...Sometimes if the pain is very bad you'll feel it in your throat... When my dad died I choked and cried...I choked on every tear I had...A tear starts rolling down my face and Freddie obviously sees and he hugs me tightly and wipes my face.

He grabs my hand and we walk towards the door. Freddie turns me around and looks into my eyes and I think hes about to kiss me again and this time I am not gonna stop him... I can't stop him... I want him to kiss me more than anything!

Freddie looks at me and then he turns away and I get that feeling back...I guess he didn't want to kiss me anymore. Me and Freddie walk into the hotel lobby with our suitcases and we give our room keys to the man at the front desk. I wonder what happened to the woman at the front desk... I don't ask though and me and Freddie get on my motorcycle. I start to think and I wonder how Freddie got here.

"Hey Freddie?"

"Yeah Sam?"

"How'd you even get down here to see me?

"Gibby drove me down here then he went straight back to Seattle... he seemed pretty upset"

I don't answer Freddie I just put on my helmet and hand Freddie the spare helmet then I start driving. In a matter of hours we're at the Bushwall plaza. We go straight up Carly's apartment and no one answers so we knock on Mrs. Benson's door and as soon as she sees us she hugs Freddie then she hugs me. We walk into the apartment and sit on the couch together and we talk for hours about her Cancer and about how Spencer died. I decide to let Freddie spend some alone time with his mother so I walk across the hall and knock again. I expected no one to answer but there stood Ms. Carly Shay. We started crying and then she pulled me into her arms and we hugged in the doorway. Freddie then walks up and hugs us both and we all start crying...


	7. Chapter 5

iMourn  
*Carly's POV*

This is gonna be the worst day of my life I already know it. Spencer is gone, it still doesn't feel real. I am sitting here in his room crying my eyes out just hoping that he's gonna bust through the door ranting about his new idea of a sculpture.  
*Loud bang on the door*  
I ran as fast as I could when I heard that bang, I thought maybe it was Spencer coming in like I had hoped but no it was Sam. As soon as I saw her I started to cry my eyes out. She cried with me. Sam doesn't cry so I know she was hurt. Then I felt another set of hands wrap around me and I just knew it was Freddie.  
"Hey guys" I said with tears running down my face and me looking as awful as can be. My hair is a mess, my voice is breaking from all the crying. I just don't know what to do with my life and then my dad hugged us also... Gosh he reminds me of Spencer a little bit you know? He has a goofy side that most people don't see; that goofy side is so much like Spencer.  
"Hey kid" Sam says "I know your heart is hurting right now Shay but it will be alright in time"  
Sam then wiped a rolling tear off of my cheek...She always knew how to make me feel better but right now it definitely wasn't working. She was trying though, I got to give her props for that.

It's around 5:30 and we've got to go to the morgue right now to see if that's my brother... Deep down I know he's in a better place but then again I wish that the body they show us isn't him. We arrive there like 20 minutes later and we approach a man in all white he asks what my name is first.  
"My name is Carly Shay"  
"Oh, Ms. Shay, my name is Dr. Jamie Diamond. If you will please come right this way" I followed him in a large room with which was white and huge it had like 50,000 drawers it seemed like and 18 tables...I counted. Sam and my dad were right behind me...Freddie was a little behind them...He seemed really affected by this, I can't imagine how anyone would take this. All I am thinking about is how its affecting me...I know it's affecting a lot of people right now. He stopped in front of this table near the back of the room and he lifted up this clip board that was attached to the table and it read 'Mr. Spencer Shay'.

Mr. Diamond waited till Freddie reached the table too...He asked me if I was ready to see him and I looked at hi mand I shook my head... I am as ready as I'll ever be...Because I knew as soon as I saw this I know I wouldn't ever be the same. Mr. Diamond lowered the cover down a little to expose his face and right then I was broken... Spencer was right there..burned really badly and he was pale as a ghost... Some of his hair is burned off. I could hear Sam bawling behind me and I turned around to hug her and I saw she was already being held by Freddie. God, he's such an amazing friend... So is Sam...I don't know what I would do I lost them two. My dad had walked away when he saw the body...He lost his son, he saw him burned badly and lying dead in a morgue. I wanna leave Seattle after this funeral and NEVER look back because their is too many pain here.  
"Yes Mr. Diamond that's Spencer Shay" He covered him up.  
"I'm so sorry for your loss"

I walk out of there crying more than I ever have in my whole life. Spencer! Why Spencer?

*The Next Day*

*Sam's POV*

"Freddie?" I say as I walk into Freddie's apartment; his mom wasn't home. We went back to the Bushwall yesterday and I stayed with Carly and I held her while she cried all night and she fianlly fell asleep and I decided I would see how freddie is holding up. I walk into Freddie's bedroom and he wasn't there. "Nub, where the hell are you?"

"Yeah?!" I hear him answer from the bathroom. I knock on the door and he opens the door and he seems like he is in a good mood. "Why are you happy?" Freddie glances me a look like I was stupid and suddently I feel like I am as stupid as he is thinking.  
"Sam, I am not happy...I am devestated..."  
"Why are you smiling then?"  
"I am trying to stay strong for everyone..."  
"Oh...I just wanted to see how you were doing...where's crazy?"  
"She's at the hospital...She's working right now"  
"When does she get off?"  
"She just left not too long ago and it's 6:30...She get off at 6 tomorrow...She works the night shift and she has a doctor's appointment with her doctor at 7 tomorrow so she won't be home till probably around 9 tomorrow."  
"Damn"  
"Yeah, so how's Carly doing?"  
"She's sleeping so I guess that's improvement, I stayed up with her all night"  
"Crying?"  
"Yeah, her brother died so she's trying to get used to the fact that he's gone"  
"I don't know what we are gonna do without him Sam"  
"Yeah, me either but we will make it through to the best we can" 


End file.
